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  • #46
    Originally posted by Naughty Nigel View Post
    We know a School Nurse fairly well. Even when our children were at primary school (with hers) she often said that some middle class parents (in particular) are only happy when their offspring are diagnosed with some condition or another because it gives them an excuse for not excelling. Simply 'being thick' is no longer an option it seems.

    I wonder whether this could explain the large number of youngsters with so-called 'conditions' and 'syndromes' that were never diagnosed or even recognised when we were at school.
    There is a definite willingness to accept a label, mainly because of the way support for the labels is given out, and it is definitely true that some parents play the label game to access better support for their children to gain an advantage to achieve better academic results.

    My eldest was diagnosed as dyslexic at the age of 16 - not due to her lack of ability or anything else, but by a knowing teacher who realised that the top grade student in everything except English had an issue. Accepting the label of Dyslexic allowed her to get the resource and help she needed to achieve excellent results in her GCSEs including a C for English (she got ungraded in the mocks!)
    I didn’t get where I am today....

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    • #47

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      • #48
        Originally posted by Naughty Nigel View Post
        I would concur with that Walti, and thank you for being so open about it. I have suffered periods of anxiety myself from time to time and I would agree that whilst the causes of anxiety of often entirely illogical it can nevertheless have life-limiting and life-changing effects. Often it comes down to expecting too much of ourselves rather than any external pressures.

        That said, I do not believe that portraying 'normal anxieties' surrounding exams, driving tests, deadlines at work, musical or sports performances and suchlike as a mental illness help anyone at all. Only when anxiety gets out of control and affects the way we live our lives does it become an illness.
        Thanks,

        The normal anxieties that we normally see are becoming more and more of a pressure to the youngsters of today, and I have genuinely seen massive physical and emotional issues caused by anxiety during the exam periods that my and other children have gone through, and this is due in part to the culture that seems to have developed of pushing the children to the limit and slightly beyond of their capabilities rather than accepting that failure is acceptable.

        The biggest issue I have is with SATS - the exams that children are pressured through by the schools... they appear to be of no benefit whatsoever to the child but are how the teachers and schools are measured so the children are pushed and pushed to get better results for the school. Important social and manual skills have been overlooked and pushed aside to achieve 50% of children being able to get to university.... the pressures some children experience are massively outside those that children should be put under!
        I didn’t get where I am today....

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        • #49
          Originally posted by Walti View Post
          There is a definite willingness to accept a label, mainly because of the way support for the labels is given out, and it is definitely true that some parents play the label game to access better support for their children to gain an advantage to achieve better academic results.

          My eldest was diagnosed as dyslexic at the age of 16 - not due to her lack of ability or anything else, but by a knowing teacher who realised that the top grade student in everything except English had an issue. Accepting the label of Dyslexic allowed her to get the resource and help she needed to achieve excellent results in her GCSEs including a C for English (she got ungraded in the mocks!)
          Dyslexia and our ability to read and write is an odd thing. Our son found reading and writing English difficult, (he is not dyslexic) and yet he can sight read four of more lines of music at almost any level of difficulty in any key signature without even trying. Music, we are told, uses a different part of the brain to other subjects but helps to wire the circuits, which is why musical children often excel in other subjects but often cannot catch a ball. Musicians are also unusually prone to anxiety.
          ---------------

          Naughty Nigel


          Difficult is worth doing

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          • #50

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            • #51
              Originally posted by Walti View Post
              Thanks,

              The normal anxieties that we normally see are becoming more and more of a pressure to the youngsters of today, and I have genuinely seen massive physical and emotional issues caused by anxiety during the exam periods that my and other children have gone through, and this is due in part to the culture that seems to have developed of pushing the children to the limit and slightly beyond of their capabilities rather than accepting that failure is acceptable.

              I remember seeing an employment consultant at my ex-employers expense shortly after I was made redundant. One thing he stressed was that you should always strive for a job that is just beyond your abilities, (or slightly beyond what you think you are capable of) and then learn on the job.

              Whilst that seems to make good sense in may ways it can enormously increase the pressure when taking on a new job, especially when combined with the normal pressures of getting to know everyone and finding that there are additional roles you were never told about!

              As I see it, there is enormous pressure to conform in a materialistic sense today, especially in the most visible ways; to have the right car, the right phone, wear the right clothes, to take holidays abroad (and to tell everyone about it on Farcebook), and to have a house and all the paraphernalia that goes with it. Beyond the basics none of this really matters but the pressure is created by clever marketeers and advertisers who try to make us feel somehow inadequate and incomplete if we cannot comply.

              Needless to say I don't drive the right car and I don't have the right phone and I really don't care about it.
              ---------------

              Naughty Nigel


              Difficult is worth doing

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              • #52
                Originally posted by Naughty Nigel View Post
                Needless to say I don't drive the right car and I don't have the right phone and I really don't care about it.
                Correct ! BMW if memory serves me right

                Jax

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                • #53
                  Originally posted by Jax View Post
                  Correct ! BMW if memory serves me right

                  Jax
                  I wouldn't want one if you gave it to me.

                  I was actually very disappointed when I drove a 530 Diesel hire car in Germany and was pleased to get back into my own car. I really don't know what the fuss is about. There is nothing particularly wrong with BMW but they are over-priced and over-rated in my view and seem to come with 'certain expectations'.
                  ---------------

                  Naughty Nigel


                  Difficult is worth doing

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                  • #54
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                    • #55
                      Originally posted by Naughty Nigel View Post
                      I wouldn't want one if you gave it to me.

                      I was actually very disappointed when I drove a 530 Diesel hire car in Germany and was pleased to get back into my own car. I really don't know what the fuss is about. There is nothing particularly wrong with BMW but they are over-priced and over-rated in my view and seem to come with 'certain expectations'.
                      Damn !

                      Another example of an aging memory !

                      Jax

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                      • #56
                        No, I also left school and served an apprenticeship. I was a bit of a 'loner' and I think that the experience of National Service would have cured me of it.

                        Jim

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                        • #57
                          Originally posted by Jim Ford View Post
                          No, I also left school and served an apprenticeship. I was a bit of a 'loner' and I think that the experience of National Service would have cured me of it.

                          Jim
                          National Service was before my time. I think it was rather like boarding school in that some loved it and some hated it but there were few in the middle.
                          ---------------

                          Naughty Nigel


                          Difficult is worth doing

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                          • #58
                            https://blogs.spectator.co.uk/2019/1...g-of-the-past/
                            Dave

                            My Flickr

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                            • #59
                              Originally posted by Naughty Nigel View Post
                              National Service was before my time. I think it was rather like boarding school in that some loved it and some hated it but there were few in the middle.
                              I was of the age when I should have served, but because of my apprenticeship I was 'deferred'. By the time I'd finished my apprenticeship, National Service had been abolished.

                              Jim

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                              • #60
                                Dave

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