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The lounge Relax, take a break from photo and camera talk - have a chat about something else for a change. Just keep it clean and polite!

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Old 12th March 2018
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Lack of Respect for the Young?

Sorry I have been quiet for the past few days but I had to take advantage of NHS hospitality last week (quite literally) to have a Laparoscopic Appendectomy. That may be a subject for another day, but suffice to say that everything is back where it should be and is working, apart from the Appendix, which as the young surgeon so eloquently put it, 'is in the bin'.

Anyhow, I digress. It strikes me that we often hear older people complaining about the lack of respect from the young, but I have encountered two appalling examples of behaviour by older people recently which rather put things into perspective.

Firstly, I was urgently called to our local GP's last Wednesday and told to bring an overnight bag. This followed a blood test the previous afternoon. When I arrived I was taken straight through to the GP ahead of waiting patients much to the annoyance of some. The GP then carried out a further thorough examination and informed me that she wanted to admit me to hospital as an emergency, making the necessary telephone calls and so forth there and then; although at this stage it still wasn't clear what the emergency was.

Clearly this process took more then ten minutes to complete which obviously irritated one of the auld women in the queue behind me. As I left the GP's room this woman came pacing down the corridor and said "that was more than ten minutes Nigel; have you got no consideration for anyone else? I have got things to do you know."

Even through the pain I was frankly gobsmacked that anyone could be so rude and arrogant, and would happily have given her a chunder for her thoughts had one been due.

Roll on Friday afternoon and our daughter was coming home from Uni for the weekend as it was her birthday and of course Mother's Day. I had bought her tickets in advance, and by buying two tickets for stages of the journey I had managed to get her First Class all the way from Stafford to Durham for £31.

Anyhow, she boarded the train at Stafford and found her booked seat by the window. No sooner had she sat down than an auld woman, who she said 'looked ancient', came from the end of the carriage and informed her that she was sitting in First Class and would have to move!

I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall as Junior Management doesn't take prisoners as a rule, but suffice to say the auld busybody was shown the ticket and told that she wasn't going anywhere!

You would think that would be the end to it but evidently the auld woman then went to find the Guard and demanded that he move our daughter to "where she belonged".

The Guard came, checked the ticket and explained that it was perfectly valid and that there was no need for anyone to move anywhere. The auld woman returned whence she came, licking her wounds, but without a word of apology.

Who the hell do these people think they are?

I wouldn't mind but our daughter takes pride in her appearance and is always quite smartly dressed, and certainly not scruffy. True to form she has promised to buy some grey trakkies for the next journey just to wind up any busybody auld women.
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Old 12th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

Both old and young can be bad mannered, as i am sure you are aware Nigel.
Good to hear that ' everything is back where it should be and is working".
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Old 12th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

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Both old and young can be bad mannered, as i am sure you are aware Nigel.
Good to hear that ' everything is back where it should be and is working".
I am well aware of that Dave but these two events seem to represent particularly bad examples within the space of a few days.
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Old 12th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

Your queue jumping act was an affront to the old lady and you did not owe her an explanation but it was your daughter's handling of the old dowager that takes the cake. Good on her!
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Old 12th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

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Originally Posted by pandora View Post
Your queue jumping act was an affront to the old lady and you did not owe her an explanation but it was your daughter's handling of the old dowager that takes the cake. Good on her!
From personal experience I would think the 'looks' from junior management would have been enough to make the dowager feel rather uncomfortable.

Shy and retiring she isn't.
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Old 12th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

Glad you are back, Nigel. Rudeness, bad manners and prejudice are unacceptable from people of any age. I wonder if the old woman on the train would have demanded that a black person be removed from first class?
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Old 13th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

Sorry to hear you’ve been through the mill, and really pleased to hear the old NH of S seems to have come through for you.

My daughter’s a fairly recently qualified GP, and has now learned no longer to be shocked by the complaints they get from people in the waiting room when they have to wait because the doctors and nurses are dealing with serious and urgent illness like yours.

To be fair, the great majority are intelligent enough to understand, but people do get stressed going to the surgery, and that can tip some people in to Basil Fawlty-like rants with very little provocation.
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

I tend to turn up close to a doctors appointment time, computer log in system. Usually I get called soon after sitting down and on nearly every occasion someone mutters " he's only here I have been waiting $$$ minutes" the fact they are waiting for a different doctor does not seem to matter.

Glad to hear you are on the mend.

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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

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Originally Posted by Johnheatingman View Post
As you say, people do get stressed in Doctor's surgeries also in dentists and hospitals. Expressing annoyance at an unexpected delay is perfectly understandable especially if the reasons have sometimes not been made clear by reception staff. However, there is never any excuse for rudeness and bad manners towards staff or others.

Some people however seem to have lost, or never possessed, the ability to complain about a situation without, bad language, rudeness and often aggression. All of which is a sad reflection on today's society.

John
I agree strongly with all of that, except to add that people have been adversely reflecting on the society of their own todays since human beings learned to write!
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

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Originally Posted by Zuiko View Post
Glad you are back, Nigel. Rudeness, bad manners and prejudice are unacceptable from people of any age. I wonder if the old woman on the train would have demanded that a black person be removed from first class?
She probably wouldn't have dared, whereas a young white-ish girl might be seen as fair game.

Actually, like me our daughter has quite a dark, Mediterranean complexion, and also appears younger than she really is; which might have made matters worse. Perhaps she should wear a headscarf next time.

However you do raise an important point John. I was horrified to hear a few weeks ago about a medical emergency on an internal flight within the USA. There was a doctor on board, but she was prevented from assisting the casualty because of her colour. Thankfully there was also a white doctor on board who told airline staff that his black colleague was better qualified to deal with the emergency, and only then was she allowed to proceed.

I get the impression that the Americans are a long way behind Europe in their attitudes towards non-whites, and I cannot see that improving for the next three years at least.
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Old 13th March 2018
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Lightbulb Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

Respect is like money: It has to be earned and given to others...
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

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Respect is like money: It has to be earned and given to others...
.... But you shouldn't have to 'earn' common decency.

Surely if you board a train with a valid ticket, take your booked seat politely and without inconveniencing others then that should be all that is expected?

Should you really have to hunt down every old dowager in the carriage to 'earn their respect' just in case they are offended by your presence?
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Old 13th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

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I strongly disagree !! Everyone no matter what age, gender, social standing or any other consideration should initially be treated with respect, good manners and common decency unless events, behaviour or experiences indicates they are not worthy.

John
I would go further. I treat everyone with equal respect until they have earned my contempt. Sadly this process is becoming shorter and the outcome more predictable as the years pass.
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Old 14th March 2018
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Re: Lack of Respect for the Young?

I reckon that Nigel's experience is just another sign of the times. The old joke ablout a visiting Geordie saying 'Hello' to a total stranger which brought London to a stand-still by the Anti-terror police, springs to mind.

People have forgotten that it is 'manners that maketh the man / woman' and not the £2,000 handbag or the £5,000 red shoes - that went out of fashion in the Wizard of OZ.

A certain 'wannabe' springs to mind when seat availability wasn't available because he / they were under the illusions of grandeur. I still haven't worked out what their problem was? That people knew who they were and didn't give a toss, or that their comfort bubble got pricked and... not to worry, They got what they probably wanted all along. A boost to their ego, and prime-time headlines on TV and in newspapers.

To be fair, at some time or another you have all been guilty as charged. I've excluded myself, as I am very much the perfect ******* gentleman.
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