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Wally
22nd January 2019, 07:48 PM
*yes An alpaca walks into a French optician's... *glasses Oh yes it did... --> https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-46933720

Otto
22nd January 2019, 09:56 PM
My cat wandered into my local pub - four times in one day and was chased out by four different dogs, so I'm told! Thankfully he avoided being run over as it's on the main street ...

MJ224
22nd January 2019, 11:03 PM
An old man walks into the doctors surgery. Receptionist asks him "What is wrong with you"

He replies "There is something wrong with my dick"

Receptionish scolds him saying "You can't say that in here, everyone can hear it. Now go back outside, then come in and say there is something wrong with your ear....".

Old man walks back out, pauses, then return to the receptionish's desk. She looks up, smiles and says" Now what is wrong with your ear..".

Old man says "I can't piss out of it..."

:(:(*chr*chr

Internaut
23rd January 2019, 12:08 AM
An old man walks into the doctors surgery. Receptionist asks him "What is wrong with you"

He replies "There is something wrong with my dick"

Receptionish scolds him saying "You can't say that in here, everyone can hear it. Now go back outside, then come in and say there is something wrong with your ear....".

Old man walks back out, pauses, then return to the receptionish's desk. She looks up, smiles and says" Now what is wrong with your ear..".

Old man says "I can't piss out of it..."

:(:(*chr*chr

We have noted in recent visits to our GP that the receptionists have become very public triage specialists. Not been a problem for me, but I did have stern words with the senior GP having overheard one patient have to describe warts, erm, somewhere a bit private.

sapper
23rd January 2019, 08:30 AM
I would not give details to a receptionist, but then I don't have to fight to get an appointment. Recently I saw the doc at 11.05 and was refered for an xray, which I had at 3pm the same day. Not private, NHS.

Naughty Nigel
23rd January 2019, 08:54 AM
A man shuffled into the doctor's surgery looking awkward and taking very small steps.

'Let me guess' said the Receptionist. 'You have pulled a muscle in your leg?' Nope', he said, 'try again'.

'OK' she said, 'have you hurt your foot?' 'Nope, try again'.

'Is it your varicose veins?' she said. 'No, I'm sorry but you are mistaken' he said.

'I thought I was going to pass wind, but I too was mistaken. Now, can I see a Doctor about it please?' :D

Phill D
23rd January 2019, 10:28 AM
Blimey Dave think I'd better move to Essex. We get third degree before we are even offered a nurse appointment! it's up to 4 weeks to get an online one and forget about any continuation of GPs between appointments.

Darkroom
23rd January 2019, 11:09 AM
Blimey Dave think I'd better move to Essex. We get third degree before we are even offered a nurse appointment! it's up to 4 weeks to get an online one and forget about any continuation of GPs between appointments.

I've discovered the best way to deal with stroppy surgery receptionists is to tell them at the beginning of the call that it's being recorded. Alternatively, if part way through an awkward conversation, just say " I have now switched on the voice recorder, so if you don't mind, can we start again ?"

I'ts amazing how their attitude suddenly changes *yes


Darkroom

sapper
23rd January 2019, 11:52 AM
Blimey Dave think I'd better move to Essex. We get third degree before we are even offered a nurse appointment! it's up to 4 weeks to get an online one and forget about any continuation of GPs between appointments.

Apart from the docs, it is warmer down here too Phil.

Naughty Nigel
23rd January 2019, 12:36 PM
I've discovered the best way to deal with stroppy surgery receptionists is to tell them at the beginning of the call that it's being recorded. Alternatively, if part way through an awkward conversation, just say " I have now switched on the voice recorder, so if you don't mind, can we start again ?"

I'ts amazing how their attitude suddenly changes *yes


Darkroom

So many receptionists behave like Gatekeepers, thinking their job is to protect 'their' Doctor (or Head Teacher for that matter) from the patients, parents, etc. :rolleyes:

TimP
23rd January 2019, 02:03 PM
So many receptionists behave like Gatekeepers, thinking their job is to protect 'their' Doctor (or Head Teacher for that matter) from the patients, parents, etc. :rolleyes:

To be fair, some people turning up at the doctors need screening out. Same as those wuckfits going to A&E for spurious reasons. Saying that, if they cant get a GP appointment are we surprised they go to A&E.
I think our GPs have figured that its all very well working full time but then they get less time to spend all that down they earn so they go part time which just exacerbates the problem of getting an appointment.
I have no idea what the solution is though, other than to stop them doing private work on the side (usually during the times us plebs want to see them) and perhaps tie them to a 37 hour week, you know like weve all worked.